Last night was the first night in the past 3 months that I slept without being nervous and scared. While Andy was in the hospital, I had my phone next on my pillow in case of emergency. Throughout the night, if Tiffany were to send us an update, my phone will buzz and I will wake up instantly to check the email to make sure they were ok. My phone didn't buzz last night.
When I woke up this morning, the wave of sadness hit me hard. It reminded me that I didn't receive an update last night, that I no longer will. Chris Tomlin song instantly came to mind, "Better is one day in your court. Better is one day in your house. Better is one day in your court than thousands elsewhere." I believe that is God reminding me to trust Him that Andy is in a great, perfect place. I just have to wait to see my friend again. For those of you who know me, patience is something I constantly struggle with. I'm amazed that God is teaching, reaching out to me in so many ways to make me more like Him, even during this difficult time.
I had an urge to call Andy's cell to hear his voice in his voicemail. But I didn't freak out his family since we already know not to call his phone. I wish he had more time. I wish I visited him more often. I wish I could have been there for his family and Tiffany more. Time is so precious. I recall attending a service at Saddleback called "One Month to Live." Pastor Doug Fields mentioned that if we were to have one month to live, what would we do differently. What would you do differently? Why haven't you done it yet? That service changed my life and it continues to shape me daily. During your busy daily life, please make time for your family, your friends, your ministry. Every second counts.
Often we ask "why?" I came across this today and I hope it will help you during the time you are lost and hurt. http://www.everystudent.com/journeys/why.html
Friday, July 24, 2009
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Andy
Hello, tonight's blog is going to be personal. I received an email from Tiffany today that Andy will be off his breathing machine tonight at 7pm Houston time. By the time I am typing this, Andy has left all of us. I am comforted knowing that he is now in Heaven where he feels no sorrow, no pain, no sickness. I am just sad. I miss him. I am hurting because I know his family is hurting. There is nothing I can do to help alleviate that pain. Only God knows their pain and only He can help them. Tonight, I am leaving all, everything, to Him.
As I am sitting here, I was going through my pictures and noticed I only have taken a few photos with Andy. Andy and I met in IPS class in 9th grade. We became really good friends very quickly. We shared a sense of humor and a love for food. I recall our phone conversations, us going to DMV together to take our drivers permit test, him helping me decide who my first boyfriend should be, cooking together in college... During college, on a weekly basis, Steph, Henry, Andy and I will have a cooking contest where one will cook dinner, one will make dessert. I recall these nights can never be on the same night that Felicity is on. We made some real fancy stuff like ox tail stew, bread pudding, sloppy joes, creme brulee... I remember Andy coming over to visit me in the first week I moved to Walnut. We had no furniture at that time and we sat on the floor listening to him share about his first girlfriend, Tiffany. He was soooo happy sharing his stories! That was during the time when they first got together. Such happy memories. Also, the Andy and Tiffany really enjoyed bowling so I have countless memories of us bowling. I recall taking Andy to buy a bowling ball for Tiffany as a surprise. It was so sweet that he knew her style. He picked out a purple ball and purple bag because that was her favorite color. I really miss the high fives we gave each other after our strikes and spares.
After college graduation, he moved to Brazil. We talk less often but we make an effort to get everyone to go bowling or eat when he is back in LA. I remember the night he was diagnosed with brain tumor in October. Steph and I just finished dressing up for a Halloween party when I received the text from Tiffany stating that were in UCLA Medical Center and that he was having brain surgery tomorrow morning. Steph and I rushed to the hospital to see him. I was there again the next morning at 5am to see him go to surgery. Andy was a true fighter. The last two years, he went through radiation, chemo, 2 brain surgeries, laser treatmeants, spinal surgery... he fought. He fought for his life so he can be with his wife and family.
Through all of this trial, I am glad he found God. During the time when he can no longer move or speak, I find comfort know that God is with him so he is not alone. I am happy that God gave him rest.
"God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging." Psalm 46:1-3
I, in return, learned so much. God showed me how endless His love is for Andy, his family, and me. When I share ask my coworkers, friends, church, and family to pray for Andy and his family, they all did. These people were complete strangers to Andy and Tiffany and they plead to God for a miracle, for peace, for a friend of a friend whom they had never met. They prayed with me, cried with me, sat with me, listened... the works. During the times that I am hurting or lost, God gave me my friends and family to support me. God worked through all of them and I praise Him for His love and support. You know who you are, and I really really really need to say Thank You. I am forever grateful that you were there with me to share my pain. I will never forget your selfless act. You truly are the salt and light.
"Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God." ~ 2 Corinthians 1:3-4
Andy, Me, and Yvette
Andy, I miss you.
As I am sitting here, I was going through my pictures and noticed I only have taken a few photos with Andy. Andy and I met in IPS class in 9th grade. We became really good friends very quickly. We shared a sense of humor and a love for food. I recall our phone conversations, us going to DMV together to take our drivers permit test, him helping me decide who my first boyfriend should be, cooking together in college... During college, on a weekly basis, Steph, Henry, Andy and I will have a cooking contest where one will cook dinner, one will make dessert. I recall these nights can never be on the same night that Felicity is on. We made some real fancy stuff like ox tail stew, bread pudding, sloppy joes, creme brulee... I remember Andy coming over to visit me in the first week I moved to Walnut. We had no furniture at that time and we sat on the floor listening to him share about his first girlfriend, Tiffany. He was soooo happy sharing his stories! That was during the time when they first got together. Such happy memories. Also, the Andy and Tiffany really enjoyed bowling so I have countless memories of us bowling. I recall taking Andy to buy a bowling ball for Tiffany as a surprise. It was so sweet that he knew her style. He picked out a purple ball and purple bag because that was her favorite color. I really miss the high fives we gave each other after our strikes and spares.
After college graduation, he moved to Brazil. We talk less often but we make an effort to get everyone to go bowling or eat when he is back in LA. I remember the night he was diagnosed with brain tumor in October. Steph and I just finished dressing up for a Halloween party when I received the text from Tiffany stating that were in UCLA Medical Center and that he was having brain surgery tomorrow morning. Steph and I rushed to the hospital to see him. I was there again the next morning at 5am to see him go to surgery. Andy was a true fighter. The last two years, he went through radiation, chemo, 2 brain surgeries, laser treatmeants, spinal surgery... he fought. He fought for his life so he can be with his wife and family.
Through all of this trial, I am glad he found God. During the time when he can no longer move or speak, I find comfort know that God is with him so he is not alone. I am happy that God gave him rest.
"God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging." Psalm 46:1-3
I, in return, learned so much. God showed me how endless His love is for Andy, his family, and me. When I share ask my coworkers, friends, church, and family to pray for Andy and his family, they all did. These people were complete strangers to Andy and Tiffany and they plead to God for a miracle, for peace, for a friend of a friend whom they had never met. They prayed with me, cried with me, sat with me, listened... the works. During the times that I am hurting or lost, God gave me my friends and family to support me. God worked through all of them and I praise Him for His love and support. You know who you are, and I really really really need to say Thank You. I am forever grateful that you were there with me to share my pain. I will never forget your selfless act. You truly are the salt and light.
"Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God." ~ 2 Corinthians 1:3-4
Andy, Me, and Yvette
Andy, I miss you.
Thursday, July 16, 2009
Houston
Hi Hi,
Steph and I arrived at Houston safely. Thanks for your prayers.
This morning we left LAX at 7:25am. Since we were flying with Southwest, I was very very thankful that we got the "A" boarding. For those who never flew Southwest before, the seats are first come first serve, so "A" means we were one of the first to board. Our flight was full so we opened up our aisle seat to this sweet old grandma. Boy, first impressions can be deceiving. While we were experiencing turbulence (it was pretty bad), she screamed "I think we are going to crash!!!." She also told the flight attendant that we were flying "too fast" and we need to slow down because her eyes are clogged. Yes, it was pretty bad.
OOOO during take off, one of the guy flight attendant was singing R Kelly, I Believe I can Fly over the PA system. It was 7:25 in the morning!!! SO many of us wanted to nap but no, he had to sing half the song... sigh. That was our flight.
Andy. We got to see him and Tiffany the minute we landed. He is currently resting. OOOO his eyes did open and squeezed my hand :) I am very happy to see him. Heading back to the hospital now.
Steph and I arrived at Houston safely. Thanks for your prayers.
This morning we left LAX at 7:25am. Since we were flying with Southwest, I was very very thankful that we got the "A" boarding. For those who never flew Southwest before, the seats are first come first serve, so "A" means we were one of the first to board. Our flight was full so we opened up our aisle seat to this sweet old grandma. Boy, first impressions can be deceiving. While we were experiencing turbulence (it was pretty bad), she screamed "I think we are going to crash!!!." She also told the flight attendant that we were flying "too fast" and we need to slow down because her eyes are clogged. Yes, it was pretty bad.
OOOO during take off, one of the guy flight attendant was singing R Kelly, I Believe I can Fly over the PA system. It was 7:25 in the morning!!! SO many of us wanted to nap but no, he had to sing half the song... sigh. That was our flight.
Andy. We got to see him and Tiffany the minute we landed. He is currently resting. OOOO his eyes did open and squeezed my hand :) I am very happy to see him. Heading back to the hospital now.
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Cupcake Class
I had a ton of fun hosting the cupcake class. The kids, as usual, are very very creative. Paul even converted his cupcake to hold a flash drive!! OOO, We even had a new student this time, so welcome Katherine!!
After class, Karen, Fiona, and I tried to whip up pasta salad with some basic ingredients I had in my fridge. Basil, sun dried tomatoes, chicken breast, and pasta. It was a shame we didn't have garlic, but I have to say, our lunch was really yum :)
After lunch, I went to get my nails done. My friend, Tina, introduced me this nail salon. I always loved her nails and now I'm hooked. This places uses a Japanese gel called Calgel that promotes nail health. For my first time, I decided to get blue, with glitter, and stars. I was hoping night sky look but the shade of blue is still a bit light, but it is pretty ;) Who's wants to go with me next time??
After class, Karen, Fiona, and I tried to whip up pasta salad with some basic ingredients I had in my fridge. Basil, sun dried tomatoes, chicken breast, and pasta. It was a shame we didn't have garlic, but I have to say, our lunch was really yum :)
After lunch, I went to get my nails done. My friend, Tina, introduced me this nail salon. I always loved her nails and now I'm hooked. This places uses a Japanese gel called Calgel that promotes nail health. For my first time, I decided to get blue, with glitter, and stars. I was hoping night sky look but the shade of blue is still a bit light, but it is pretty ;) Who's wants to go with me next time??
Friday, July 10, 2009
I haven't been feeling too great this past week so didn't have the time to post. Here is a twist box idea that I got from Stampin'Up! It is really easy to make so this might go into August class idea. Let me know what you think!
Chocolate Chip Cardstock, Pacific Point Card Stock, Barely Banana Card Stock
Chocolate Chip Cardstock, Pacific Point Card Stock, Barely Banana Card Stock
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
Money Card
Steph commissioned me to make a money holder card for her.. her is what I came up with. The little envelope inside is where the money goes. Hope she likes it :)
Last night I watched The Stoning of Soraya M. This movie is based on a true story about one of the victims of stoning in modern Iran. This movie illustrated the lack of woman rights, uncivil laws, mob mentality, the lists goes on. My heart breaks that in today's day and age, the meaning of justice and fairness does not exist in many parts of the world. One part of the movie that truly bothered me was under Sharia Law, women need to prove their innocence, while men needs proof to show guilt. How does a women prove innocence? How does anyone prove innocence? I am just doing my part to spread the word about the violence and please go watch the movie.
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